Birthday Without Surprises
by kira862
Summary: The day you turn eighteen is the point in your life most people consider the ascent into adulthood. Shinji's birthday is just around the corner, but for him and Asuka, adulthood may happen sooner. Contains Lemon!
1. Reluctance

**Rated M for: Language and Lemon**

**Alright, here is the start of my new story set during After Impact with a birthday theme. Honestly, one of the reasons why I want to do this story is because I haven't done lemon in almost two years, so its partially to prepare for what happens in Two of Us. Be that as it may, I still plan on having some fun with this. Expect chapters daily (and possibly some double posts) **

* * *

Each year seemed the same...or was it? How long had Shinji and Asuka known each other? That was probably the more appropriate question. It had been several years since there sojourn with Nerv and even though it had seemed a long time for them, in reality, it had hardly been a full year. Now though, things were...different. Or was that even the right word?

They were both seventeen now and three years had passed since the invasion of the angels. Even so, they were still very much stuck together, living at Misato's apartment. However, that was all about to change soon.

There years of high school had just wrapped up a week ago, and now the prospect of college was looming over them. Asuka of course already knew what she wanted to do with her future, but Shinji was a different matter. College was something that he admittedly hadn't thought about much, but after awhile (and largely thanks to Asuka) he had warmed up to the idea. His decision irked Asuka though when he told her that he had decided to go to the same college as her.

She planned on getting a degree in engineering, and even though she didn't actively participate in activities at Nerv anymore, she still couldn't see herself working anywhere else. This may have been largely influence by the fact that her had mother worked there. Shinji on the other hand thought he may try culinary as his degree. Cooking was the one thing that he was good at, and as Misato frequently told him (and Asuka on certain days) he was an excellent cook.

After all that however, there were still a few things left to take care of.

Shinji's birthday was rapidly approaching, as Misato kept reminding him. Shinji had never been one for birthdays, mainly because his father had ignored them half the time. But eighteen was a rather important part of his life as he would become an adult then. Misato had said that she would throw a party for him, though Shinji was skeptical about this.

Misato's work load had increased so much during this past year that it was rare to find her awake at the apartment, and when she was, she was usually drunk. Nerv had undergone a shift since Third Impact had been avoided, and they were now in charge of reforming Tokyo-3. Much of the original infrastructure had of course been destroyed during the course of Seele's attack on Nerv, and because of this, Nerv felt responsible for the attack. Fuyutsuki was now the acting director of Nerv since Gendo was unable to be found after Third Impact. Shinji knew his father was alive somewhere, but understood somehow that he wanted to be left alone. He respected this, but also didn't care at the same time. Through the years, he had become his own man, not relying on the help of others as much. Asuka was a bit of an exception though.

Even after there job as Evangelion pilots ended, they still lived together in Misato's apartment. At one point, Asuka had gotten her own place, but eventually had to admit that it was too difficult to take care of the place. Shinji suspected that she just preferred having him around to help clean and cook. He didn't mind this that much though, and thought he would have even gone with her if she had asked him.

Not much had changed with them however, and they still argued frequently, though it was much more tame then it used to be. They had already gotten used to Misato not being there, so Shinji had eventually gotten Asuka to agree on several things. If he would cook, then she would have to do the dishes. They swapped this occasionally, on the off chance that Asuka wanted to cook, which did happen. She had gotten better over the years, thanks to watching Shinji so much, and could cook German food better than Shinji by now. She still preferred his cooking though.

They had certainly grown more close to each other though, and would talk long hours into the night just about random stuff. Shinji was rather glad that the pressure of being an Evangelion pilot had been lifted from there shoulders. Shinji had always enjoyed Asuka's company, and she had mellowed out after Third Impact was avoided. They had learned more about each in the past years then they had learned about each other as fellow pilots. This was partially in tribute to Asuka's superiority complex all but dissipating, though it did crop up sometimes as well.

All in all, things had progressed smoothly since that time.

Shinji was first to awake that morning, as he usually was. Cooking breakfast quickly, as Asuka would be out, and sure enough, moments later, she was.

Asuka was never much of a morning person, though her grogginess was usually alleviated with a shower. As Shinji started cooking bacon, he heard the sound of running water coming from the bathroom. Asuka usually took her time in the bathroom, as girls were want to do, and it was almost half an hour before she came out drying her hair.

"Breakfast ready yet?" asked Asuka as she stepped into the kitchen.

"More or less," said Shinji as he load up a plate with a stack of toast and set it on the table.

"Thanks," said Asuka as she sat down at the small table.

Asuka had been quicker to show her gratitude towards Shinji these past few years, and Shinji was grateful for that.

"Eggs and bacon should be up soon," said Shinji as he turned back towards the stove.

Asuka nodded as she bit into a piece of toast. Shinji would have made a plate for Misato if she hadn't already left for Nerv. Sometimes he got up earlier to make breakfast for her, but she usually just grabbed something on her way to Nerv.

"Have you decided whether you'll be sleeping in the dormitories or finding an apartment yet Asuka?"

"For the last time, no I haven't yet Shinji," sighed Asuka, feeling slightly annoyed.

Shinji had started to ask her this a lot recently, ever since they had decided on going to college together, of which Asuka still resented. She had a suspicion that he was asking this in hopes that they could move in together. It was fine living with Misato, but living together on there own was too much for Asuka to take.

Shinji let it drop with this, though he did sigh internally. Even though they would be focusing on different subjects in college, it made sense to live together, if only to split the living costs. Asuka couldn't see this however, or refused to see it more like.

They ate breakfast together, just as they had many days before that, but Asuka had just remembered something.

"Isn't your birthday coming up Shinji?"

Shinji could have dropped his fork in surprise.

Whenever his birthday came around, Asuka usually all but ignored it. She did usually get him a gift, even if it was rather thoughtless. Shinji suspected that Misato went with her almost every year and helped her chose something for him, though it was never anything special. Shinji remembered one memorable year when Asuka had bought him a saucepan. As if Shinji hadn't already bought enough of those with his income from Nerv. When he had first moved into Misato's apartment, she hardly had any utensils, so he had taken it upon himself to correct this. A saucepan was the last thing he needed, so you could expect his surprise when Asuka brought up his birthday.

"It is," said Shinji evenly.

"Whats with the tone?" asked Asuka, her eyes narrowing sharply.

"Didn't think you were one to remember it."

Asuka tutted loudly and laid her fork on the plate with a 'clank.'

"What?" asked Shinji, surprised at her reaction. "I'm just surprised you remembered is all."

"We celebrate the damn thing every year, so how is it a surprise I would have forgotten it?"

'Because you seemed so keen on remembering it years prior to this,' thought Shinji

"Well?" asked Shinji, "what about it?"

"Is Misato going to try throwing a party again?"

"She said she would, but with her work, I don't think she'll find the time."

"Not like anybody would come to begin with," mumbled Asuka almost inaudibly.

Shinji ignored this. The only people that had been present during his last party had been Touji and Kensuke. Kensuke was now away on military scholarship that had started the moment he had finished high school, and Touji was away on vacation with his family the entire month of June. Rei of course had been to a few of his parties as well, but she was in the same position as Misato right now.

After Third Impact, Rei was able to return, and even though she was a clone of Shinji's mother, he had eventually come to terms with that. Shinji talked to her when he got the chance, much to Asuka's displeasure, but it had been some time since he had gotten ahold of her. She seemed to be working together with Ritsuko currently, which surprised Shinji since he knew Ritsuko had resented her. What she did though was a mystery to Shinji.

After Third Impact, Shinji all but quit Nerv, though he still received paychecks now and then which he assumed was thanks to Misato. Asuka still went in occasionally as she wanted to work there after college, but Shinji didn't want anything to do with the company, even in this After Impact world. This stemmed from his fathers involvement with Nerv, and Shinji's own desire to separate himself from his father. He wanted to make his own decision now.

After finishing dinner, Asuka washed the dishes as was required, and proceeded to watch T.V. She still did this a lot, even if it was just to keep her occupied. Shinji decided to take a shower afterwards, hoping that there was still some hot water left after Asuka had used it.

After finishing with his shower, Shinji found that Asuka had vacated her seat in the living room and was talking on the phone. He didn't bother listening in, though he surmised that she was talking to Hikari.

Hanging up the phone, Asuka turned to Shinji and said-

"Hikari wants to go shopping with me. Apparently she wants to get something for Touji when he gets back for vacation."

"Isn't it a little soon for getting him something. They just left a few days ago."

"You how she is with him," said Asuka as she rolled her eyes.

"Are you going then?"

"I guess," said Asuka. "Its either that or stay here and be bored with you."

Shinji didn't say anything about this. Now that high school had ended and they didn't have much to do, things did get boring around here.

"Well, I'm going to change and then meet her downtown," said Asuka.

Without waiting for Shinji to reply, Asuka walked into her bedroom and shut the door. Shinji couldn't blame her for wanting to get away from the apartment. He himself would have liked to leave as well, but seeing as he didn't have any reason to be out...

'Even just going out with Asuka for a while would have been fine,' he thought. At the same time though, he wondered where that thought had come from. His emotions got confused sometimes when he thought about Asuka, but he tried to ignore them most of the time. As they had lived together for a while, Shinji considered Asuka to be a close friend of his, probably the closest, and even though Asuka wouldn't say it, she thought of Shinji as a friend as well. Anything else just seemed strange.

"I'm over thinking this," mumbled Shinji as he walked into his own bedroom and lay down on his bed, throwing his earbuds into his ears, and tuning the world.

Asuka had a hard time relating to Hikari sometimes. Maybe it was just because Hikari was a normal girl, whereas Asuka had been trained by Nerv to be an Evangelion pilot. She sometimes forgot what it was like to be a girl, and living with Shinji and Misato didn't help this either. Or maybe it was the concept of love that alluded her.

Asuka could never understand Hikari's taste, namely what she saw in Touji. Asuka looked at Touji much the same as she would look at dog shit on someones shoes, disgusting in other words.

Asuka had never loved anyone other than her mother, and she could hardly even remember her to begin with. Of course, there had been plenty of guys who had asked her out during high school, but she had shot all of them down. Most of them still had suspicions that her and Shinji were dating leading all the way up to graduation, but she had learned to ignore it for the most part. Shinji still laughed though when he heard about the latest person that she had shot down. Even Asuka had to smile at this sometimes.

Living with Misato and Shinji had been such a large part of her life recently that it was hard to imagine her life without them, or even the Evangelions for that matter. She got along well enough with Hikari, as she was one of the only girls that didn't seem to hate her for being so popular. Other than that though, she didn't have many people to confide in.

After finishing the shopping, Asuka and Hikari stopped at a fast foot joint. Asuka wasn't very hungry, but Hikari said that she hadn't eaten yet today.

"Do you think Touji will like what I got him?" asked Hikari as they sat down.

"No clue," replied Asuka. She was pretty sure that Touji would have simply enjoyed some of Hikari's cooking instead of what she got him.

"How are things going at Misato's?"

"Same as usual. She work constantly and Shinji and I are at the apartment by ourselves most of the time."

"Has anything happened with Shinji recently?" Hikari asked innocently.

"Why?"

Hikari rolled her eyes slightly. Asuka may be smart about some things, but in others, she was clueless.

"Speaking of Shinji, isn't his birthday coming up?"

"How did you manage to remember that?"

"Last year Touji told me that he was going. I remembered it was around this time."

"Yeah, it is," said Asuka who's expression had turned sour.

"Are you doing anything for it?"

"Myself? No. Misato says she will, but nothing ever really happens."

Hikari eyed Asuka for several seconds before she sighed and rested the palm of her hand on her chin.

"Asuka, don't you think you should get him something this year that will actually mean something?"

Shrugging, Asuka said, "I'll just have Misato help me get him something like I usually do."

'Why do I even try,' thought Hikari.

"Hasn't Shinji gotten you stuff for your birthday in the past? I seem to remember he even made you a cake last year."

Asuka paused as she thought about this. True, Shinji had made a cake for her birthday last year, and it was rather good. She seemed to even remember complementing him on it as well.

"Yeah, he has," nodded Asuka offhandedly.

"So do something for him this year," said Hikari.

'That was rather difficult,' thought Asuka.

Even though she had spent a good part of the last three years of her life around Shinji, she still didn't really know what he liked to be honest. He had zero hobbies, and his likes and dislikes weren't even very substantial. Asuka thought about getting him some music, since she knew he liked classical stuff, but that felt plain at the same time.

"I'll think about it maybe," said Asuka. Anything to end the conversation.

It wasn't that Asuka disliked Shinji. She did like him, to a certain extent, but she also got confused around him. Shinji had been there for her during many moments of her life, none of which had been easy for her to get through. She supposed that if not for Shinji, she could still be in a bit of a slump.

After Third Impact, Asuka was lost, to put it loosely. She didn't have anything to do with her life. Without being an Evangelion pilot, everything that she strived for was suddenly lost. What purpose did she have if not for her piloting skills? It was Shinji that had taken a hold of her then, hugged her. She couldn't remember the words he had said, but they had calmed her. They had both hurt each other by their actions, but they were able to forgive each other after Third Impact. She supposed it was because of that that she felt so comfortable around Shinji. Sometimes, she even felt too comfortable around him.

"Well, I'm ready," said Hikari as she picked up her tray.

"Same," said Asuka.

While Asuka was away, Shinji spent most of his time cleaning the apartment. Misato's room itself took several hours to clean it felt like, as there were empty beer cans strewn across the ground complete with carpet stains. Shinji cleaned every bit of the apartment except for Asuka's room. He knew that area was off limits, even without Asuka reminding him every time he vacuumed. He was actually thankful that she cleaned her own room, as it was one last thing for him to have to deal with.

Shinji was just brewing himself a cup of tea when he heard the front door open and close, signifying that Asuka was back. As she walked into the kitchen, she saw that tea kettle on the stove and said-

"Glad you're making tea. It's surprisingly cold outside."

"In the summer?" asked Shinji. Asuka got cold easily, though it was still a surprise to hear her complain about the weather during the summer.

"That bother you?" she asked.

"No, not really. How was Hikari?"

"Fine. Couldn't stop talking about Touji."

"You sound annoyed."

"Am I?" asked Asuka as Shinji passed her a cup of tea. "The guy hasn't even been gone a week, and she already misses him."

"I'm sure he feels the same way," said Shinji.

"I'm not even sure if that idiot can feel," scoffed Asuka.

Shinji had to laugh at that.

"You clean while I was gone?"

"Yeah, Misato's room mostly.

"Hmmm," mumbled Asuka.

Shinji spent the next few minutes rinsing out the kettle and placing the tea back into the cupboard when Asuka asked him something.

"Hey Shinji, would you be interested in going out together tomorrow?"

"Huh?" asked Shinji, not quite sure he had heard that right.

"Do I need to repeat myself?" asked Asuka. "Tomorrow, we should look for apartments near the college.

"Finally taking my advice?"

"If I don't, then I'll just continue to hear you complain about it, and it makes sense to search for apartments together. Though not under the same roof of course."

"Right," said Shinji.

"So...wanna?"

"Yeah, though we should run it by Misato tonight first."

"Will she care even?"

"Considering that she's our guardian...yes. She may not be around much anymore, but she is still our guardian."

"...I suppose you have a point," said Asuka.

With her last sentence hanging, Asuka stood up and walked into the living room, turning on the T.V. as she lay on the couch.

Shinji continued sitting on the kitchen table with his tea clasped between his hands, wondering what had spurred Asuka on to make this decision. Whatever it had been, he was glad of the change. It had been a while since him and Asuka had done something together, and was looking forward to it.

The prospect of college was a daunting thing of course, but Shinji supposed that if he and Asuka were neighbors, things would work out okay. He would still of course be stuck cooking for her everyday of course, but being on his own had a certain vibe to it. He thought of Misato as a parent since his had never been around much, and it would be sad to say goodbye to her. But knowing that Asuka would be going with him made that pain easier to bare.

Shinji looked at the calendar on the kitchen wall, thinking that this birthday might end of differently afterall.


	2. Decisions

**Here we go, second chapter, second day. Plenty more days to go until this is done (and till the romance gets more interesting), but there is a possibility there wont be a chapter tomorrow as I'm gonna be in LA for a bit tomorrow. If that happens, expect a double post on Monday. **

* * *

It was early that morning when Shinji and Asuka woke up at about the same time. Shinji made breakfast that morning as he usually did, and they left at about nine.

They had broached the subject when Misato had come home last night but had to stay up after midnight before they could talk to her. Even so, it seemed that much of what they told her went over her head. Shinji couldn't tell how she had taken the news, if she had even heard them, but hoped that she wouldn't be too crestfallen.

Locking up the apartment as they left, Shinji and Asuka walked down the winding staircase that led to the bottom of the apartment complex. Neither of them could drive yet, so they were forced to take the bus. The college itself was about twenty minutes away from Misato's apartment, so it wasn't as though they couldn't visit her on weekends.

"Any idea what kind of apartment you want?" asked Shinji as they waited for the bus.

"A one bedroom should be fine," said Asuka. "I don't think I would need anything other than that."

Asuka glanced sideways at Shinji as he said this, wondering if the thought of a two bedroom was still on his mind.

"Probably," said Shinji. "Its not like either of us own much stuff to begin with.

Shinji was a prime example of this, having been shuffled around by his father most of his life, but Asuka had slowly started getting rid of things she no longer needed as she got older.

The bus pulled up alongside them then and together they got on. The ride was uneventful for the most part, and hardly anybody was even on it, which was unusual for Tokyo-3. Shinji was rather glad for this, as he knew predators used buses as a mean to prey on woman. Asuka was usually oblivious to this however, and Shinji had once or twice gotten a bad feeling from certain guys. Thing is, he was sure that if they did try something to Asuka, they would have gotten the shit beat out of them, and not by Shinji. Asuka had taken combat training classes in Germany before she arrived in Tokyo-3, and she could easily take of herself.

Today, Asuka was sporting simple jeans and a faded blue t-shirt with her hair was tied behind her in a ponytail. She had stopped wearing her A10 nerve receptors at one point, but Shinji knew she still kept them somewhere in her room as a memento of her time spent as a pilot. Shinji himself hadn't wanted anything to remember about his time at Nerv, so he had asked Misato to get rid of his plug suit and all the accessories.

They sat next to each other, their arms bumping into each other. Shinji kept on stealing sideways glances at Asuka. Shinji had to admit, that Asuka was incredibly beautiful, and he was often ridiculed by the other guys in his class about not creating an opportunity at some point. Shinji had ignored these for the most part, knowing that Asuka had to deal with similar things, but the thought still existed, even if he tried to reject it. It disgusted him to a certain point, but he was in the midst of puberty, so some urges were expected. He wondered what Asuka truthfully thought about him sometimes, though knowing that her feelings were even more sealed off than his own.

Asuka never tried to look good, but she didn't have to put much effort into this in the first place. It was something that just came naturally for her. Her personality had improved, but she was still warrant to bite back and some of the more stubborn guys that tried dating her. Though she had said it before, Shinji was surprised when she had told him that she felt most relaxed around him. He wasn't sure if this was because she knew he would never do something to her, or if she just trusted him.

They stopped as they reached there destination, but they still had to walk several blocks until they could reach the apartment complex. The apartment wasn't far from the college, so it had been Shinji and Asuka's first choice in looking for a place to live.

By comparison, it was smaller than Misato's, but it was a nicer complex since it had been built after Third Impact.

Walking towards the main office, Shinji opened the door and followed Asuka through it. The realtor greeted them warmheartedly and asked them-

"You two looking for an apartment?"

"Yeah," said Shinji.

"College students?" she asked.

"Yes," nodded Asuka.

"Great," she said as she clapped her hands together. "We have a large spacious one bedroom that I can show you two if you're interested."

"Umm...we were thinking about separate apartments actually," started Asuka before Shinji had a chance to chime.

The realtor quickly corrected her mistake in assuming they were a college couple and wanted a single bedroom. After make up that mistake, the realtor directed them to two second floor apartments. She asked them if they wanted adjacent buildings, and Shinji and Asuka were able to agree on that.

They climbed the stairs and the realtor showed them both buildings, each the exact same as the previous. They would have to get furnishings for them, but that wouldn't be a problem for them. Asuka had a little more money than Shinji, but even Shinji should have enough to get a few things.

The realtor left them alone for a while as they sat in what could eventually be Shinji's apartment.

"What do you think of this place?" asked Asuka.

"It seems fine enough. The layout isn't much different than Misato's apartment, just the fact that it lacks two other bedrooms, and it is slightly more larger."

"Should we sign the contract then."

Though Asuka had meant separately, Shinji almost took it the opposite way, confused over her wording. Still though, it seemed a bit earlier to make a decision. There were several other complex's that they had decided to check out before making a decision.

"Maybe," said Shinji eventually. "But I think we should look at some of the others. The price is reasonable here, and it is undeniably cheaper than the dormitories that the college has to offer. Still, we may find something better."

"Okay," said Asuka as she stood up and stretched.

As she did so though, Shinji had a question for her.

"Asuka, how do you feel about living on your own now?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you tried this before, and...things didn't go as you had intended."

Asuka frowned at him, but for once, she had to agree with Shinji.

"True, it wasn't like I had imagined, but I think that was because I was too young then. With college and all, it just seems assumed that I'd be moving out of Misato's apartment and starting my own life. I'm older now, and can make my own decision better than when I was young. I always strived to be as adult like as possible, but in truth, I was still very much a kid. I realized that when I tried to live on my own. Now though...well, I hope things will be different."

Shinji was surprised at how truthful Asuka was here, and it showed on his face.

"And besides," continued Asuka, "we'll likely be living directly next to each other, so its not as though things are changing entirely.

Shinji had thought about this, but wondered if Asuka had noticed as well. When the realtor asked if they wanted apartments next to each other, both him and Asuka had agreed with hardly any discussion. It was almost as though that had already been predetermined.

"True," said Shinji with a slight nod.

They left the complex, talking to the realtor as they left and telling her they would call if they decided on an apartment.

They spent the next few hours walking to the other apartments and looking at them. For the most part, they were much the same as the first, though some were more expensive. Neither of them had much of an opinion on these next few, so they called it quits for the day as evening was starting to settle.

* * *

Arriving back at there current apartment, Shinji was fishing the key out of his pocket as the door opened and Misato was surprisingly standing there.

"Uh...Misato? What are you doing back so early?"

"I got time off so I could talk to you about what you said last night."

"So you did hear us?"

"Yes, I did," stated Misato.

Shinji wasn't sure why, but by the tone of her voice, she didn't seem pleased, or maybe it was skeptical.

"And I want to talk to you about it," she finished.

Asuka and Shinji glanced at each other, but walked into the apartment wordlessly.

They all sat down at the kitchen table, and Misato started.

"Did you find yourself an apartment you two?"

"Not yet," said Shinji.

"And we aren't living together," mumbled Asuka.

She seemed to have diminished slightly under Misato's watchful gaze.

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Misato, we're old enough now to make our own decisions," said Shinji firmly. "Not to mention I'm almost eighteen."

Misato frowned at them, but eventually sighed and said, "We'll if this is what you two want. Though I suppose I should help you move. How many complex's did you check out?"

"A few," said Asuka, "all of which were the same more or less."

"Hmmm...well, let me know when you make a decision. I'll manage to get time off to help with the moving. On another note though, Shinji?"

Misato turned towards him as she said this, and Shinji at first thought he was in trouble and she next asked-

"Do you want anything in particular for your birthday?"

Shinji wasn't sure how he was supposed to respond to this. No, there wasn't anything he could think of that he wanted really badly, or that he needed at all. But Misato's words made him think briefly. He looked sideways at Asuka, but her face had turned passive in the sudden change in conversation.

"Nothing really," said Shinji with a shrug.

"Shinji you're going to be eighteen in little more than a week. Eighteen is...unlike other birthdays I guess since you become an adult then. I think something should be done at the very least."

As Misato said this, she took a sidelong glance at Asuka, hoping that she was getting the hint that Misato was throwing at her. Asuka still seemed to be ignoring the conversation though.

"Really Misato, you don't have to make a big deal about it," said Shinji as he stood up.

"Shinji-"

"Its fine Misato."

Shinji left them sitting at the table and walked into his room. Really, they didn't have to make a big deal out of it.

Back in the kitchen, silence had engulfed Asuka and Misato. Since Shinji had left, neither of had spoken, however, Misato had something she had to ask Asuka.

"Asuka...you don't plan on giving Shinji the usual present like previous years."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Don't you care about him?" Misato asked her.

Asuka bit her lips in frustration. She did, but communicating it was an entirely different matter. Asuka had never been good with emotions, though neither had Shinji for that matter. Both of them were unsure how to express there feelings, and because of that, they were unable to communicate sometimes. Asuka knew this of course, but it didn't make it any easier. If she was truthful to herself, she did want to get Shinji something more meaningful this year, even without Misato and Hikari telling her to. Still, the problem was that she wasn't sure what to get him.

"I do," said Asuka after a few seconds. "But..."

"But what?" asked Misato. "I don't think Shinji would complain even if you picked something horrible for him. Just get him something that you think he would like, something that you yourself picked."

Asuka didn't think it would be that easy, but she didn't reply to Misato.

"Well, I only stopped by here to talk to you both about the apartments, so I have to head back to Nerv now."

"Okay," said Asuka, her voice small.

"And tell Shinji that Rei says high. She hasn't been able to get ahold of him recently because of her work, but she is still thinking about him. Oh, also, tell Shinji not to worry about saving dinner for me tonight. I'm going out with Kaji tonight."

This brought Asuka's smile slightly back, and she waved Misato off.

Moments later, Shinji looked out to find Asuka standing in the hallway, having just seen Misato depart.

"Did Misato leave?" he asked.

"Yeah. She said she had to go back to Nerv."

"Still busy," sighed Shinji.

"Not busy enough," said Asuka. "She's going with Kaji tonight she said, so you don't have to make dinner for her. Oh, and Rei says high as well."

"She did?" wondered Shinji. "I was wondering how she was doing..."

Shinji would have liked to talk with Rei, but he didn't even know if she had a cellphone.

"What do you want for dinner then if Misato isn't going to be home?"

"Stir fry maybe," said Asuka. "I'll help with the preparation as well."

"You will?" asked Shinji somewhat surprised.

"Sure," shrugged Asuka.

Shinji was grateful on the rare moments when Asuka helped prepare dinner with him. She usually helped him cut the vegetables and cook the rice. It made things go quicker, but there was something about being in the kitchen alongside Asuka that felt right.

Dinner went quicker with the two of them, and they were soon washing the dishes together.

"Hey Shinji?"

"Hmmm?" he replied to her question.

"What you said before...are you really okay with not celebrating your birthday at all this year?"

"Did Misato put you up to this?"

"She talked to me about it yeah...but I'm asking you myself. Are you okay with this?"

"Why do you suddenly care Asuka?" Shinji asked her instead.

Asuka was taken aback by this, and wasn't sure how to reply at first.

"Shinji...you are going to be eighteen so...do you want anything in particular?"

"You mean like something that you and Misato got together?"

"No, something that I got just for you."

"You don't have to do that Asuka," said Shinji after recovering from his temporary loss of speech. Asuka actually wanted to get him something? Something that was heartfelt? He wasn't sure why he had rejected that though. Maybe he didn't want Asuka to have to worry about getting him something. In truth, her just being there was fine.

"Again...its fine Asuka. You don't have to get anything for me. Honestly, just you being here is fine."

It had been a while since Asuka blushed, but she did now. A pink flush appeared on her cheeks and her lips seemed to darken as well. She seemed flustered, her expression changing rapidly. Shinji hadn't seen Asuka this embarrassed in a while, and he had to admit, it was rather alluring.

"Shinji...you..."

Shinji smirked slightly before walking away from the dishwasher, leaving Asuka still embarrassed behind him.

It was sometime later before she came out into the living, still angry and embarrassed about Shinji's remark.

"You can be a really ass sometimes Shinji."

"What? I only said what I thought."

"How about you try not speaking your mind sometimes then idiot."

"Why are you getting so angry?"

"I'm not angry, I just don't understand why you don't want me to get you something. I've never gotten you anything before that actually meant something...so this year I thought I would change that. Especially if we're going to be leaving Misato's."

"That mean a lot to me Asuka in its own right," replied Shinji.

Asuka frowned at him, wondering how Shinji could be so stubborn at times. She almost felt that something of her own stubbornness was rubbing off on him.

'Well, enough though he said he didn't want anything, doesn't mean I can't get something,' thought Asuka. It was best to keep it a surprise in the first place.

"Fine," said Asuka, "if you want to be stubborn, be that way."

Sitting down on the couch next to Shinji, she crossed her legs and remained silent, turning on the T.V. though Shinji could see her smiling slightly.

'She must be planning something,' thought Shinji. He wasn't that surprised that Asuka hadn't given up in all honesty.

They were silent for most of the time, and it was several hours later until Shinji decided to go to bed.

He was too tired to think about what Asuka had told him earlier, though in the room next to him, Asuka was wide awake. She was thinking about what to get Shinji, but nothing was coming to mind. She honestly thought about asking Misato, but even that seemed to be a bit unfair. She wanted this to be something she got by herself without any outside help.

'Its difficult though,' thought Asuka.

Her last thought before Asuka fell asleep was that of surprising Shinji on his birthday.


	3. Regret

**Right, so I'm about two hours short of getting a double post out considering its now 2 in the morning, so I guess today is a triple post. So here are the first two and expect the next sometime in the evening**

* * *

Shinji woke up that morning feeling rather restless, but not nearly as restless as Asuka. As she walked out of her room, Shinji saw that she had circles under her eyes and her tank top was barely clinging on to her body.

"Morning," said Shinji.

Asuka grumbled back at him as she made her way into the bathroom. Shinji laughed lightly at that, but continued eating his breakfast.

As the water came on in the bathroom, Shinji started to hear Asuka humming softly. Hopefully she would feel better after a warm shower.

Shinji made coffee as she was showering, trying to wake himself up in the process. He had dreamed last night, something which hadn't happened in a while. It unnerved him, only because it had been about his time as an Evangelion pilot. He hated dreaming about that, because it reminded him what he had once done.

Shinji had tried ignoring everything that he had been involved with during Third Impact, but he had eventually come to terms with it. He blamed himself for the majority of it, as it had been his decision to nullify the AT-fields, even though he had been indirectly influenced by his father and Seele. He had rejected it in the end though, largely thanks to Rei, and things had progressed as they had. He had talked several times about this to Asuka, who still had mixed feelings over the subject. She had forgiven him over what he had done, but it still had not been an easy thing. The first few months after everyone returned had been rough for them, as they were still feeling the pain that they had inflicted on one another during there time at Nerv. As they got older though, they had forgiven each other of everything.

Last night, he had woken in a cold sweat, dreaming that he had still been lost in that sea of LCL fluid, voices swarming around him. He had a tough time going to sleep after that, and so, was still feeling groggy this morning. He wondered what had kept Asuka up all night though.

Shortly after thinking this, the bathroom door opened and Asuka stepped out, clad only in a red towel. Her hair glistened with water droplets and swayed as she walked towards the kitchen. Shinji tried not to notice these things, but it was hard not to, and he could feel something stirring within him.

It wasn't unheard of to see Asuka looking so uncaring as to her attire, but it was still unusual.

Shinji looked away as she sat down, but he couldn't help but notice the distinct line that revealed her cleavage.

"Feeling better now?" asked Shinji as he tried to focus on a line in the table.

"Somewhat," mumbled Asuka as she leaned back in her chair, revealing more of herself in the process.

"I made coffee," said Shinji as he quickly stood up.

Asuka turned her head towards him, wondering why he seemed so jumpy.

"You did?"

"Yeah, it seemed that both of us didn't sleep very well last night."

"Why would you ask that?" asked Asuka, feeling skeptical. She had woken up almost every other hour, tossing and turning. She kept on debating on what to get Shinji, and because of that, she had spent a good part of the night tossing and turning.

"No, you just seemed tired is all."

"Well, I'm feeling better now," sighed Asuka as she took a sip of her coffee. Looking up at Shinji, she saw that he was averting his gaze from her. This struck her as somewhat strange, as his simple attitude around her had been somewhat uncaring it seemed.

"Whats wrong with you Shinji," she asked.

"...Nothing...its just that...what your wearing is rather..."

Shinji couldn't help but turn red slightly as he mumbled this. Asuka didn't now how tempting she was right now, and Shinji didn't want to say it out right either.

"What are you-" Asuka started, but then she looked down at herself and understood what he meant.

"Oh," she said softly. She hadn't thought about the towel, but it seemed that Shinji had. She felt embarrassed as well.

Standing up suddenly, Asuka gripped the towel towards her chest and darted into her bedroom. As Shinji heard her bedroom door close, he turned back around, now that it was safe to look.

'She can be rather clueless at times,' thought Shinji. But as she had said before, she felt no sense of harm around Shinji, half naked or not. He could think of many guys that would have jumped at the opportunity to see her as such.

It was sometime later before Asuka came out, fully clothed now, and trying to forget about what had just happened. Shinji didn't bother bringing it up, and neither did Asuka seem to want to discuss it. As the years had gone on, neither had had much of problem showing skin around each other. Maybe it had been because Shinji was purposefully ignoring how she looked that it had seemed strange. They had both gotten flustered, something which hadn't happened in a while.

Asuka finished her cold coffee, neither of them speaking much, and then she want into the living room. Shinji didn't follow, still feeling strange from what had happened earlier, but all to quickly, the phone in the kitchen started ringing. Answering it swiftly, Shinji heard Misato on the other end.

"Misato?" asked Shinji, "how come you're calling so earlier?"

"I actually had something I wanted to ask Asuka," was the reply on the other end.

Shinji looked at the phone in his hand for a second before he turned towards the living room and said, "Asuka...Misato wants to talk to you for a second."

Asuka stepped halfway out of the living as she asked, "What does she want."

"No idea, she wouldn't say."

Asuka frowned, but walked towards Shinji and took the phone from him. Though Shinji could only hear one side of the conversation, he understood that Asuka wasn't entirely thrilled about what she was hearing.

"Yeah...I'll be over in a bit Misato," mumbled Asuka as she hung up the phone.

"What was that about?" asked Shinji as Asuka continued staring at the phone.

"...Misato wants me to come into Nerv for a bit...says she needed my help with something."

Though this had happened several times before now, Shinji never liked hearing this. He had always been afraid that something would happen to Asuka if she went into Nerv. Maybe he was simply projected his own hatred for Nerv onto this, but he still worried about her.

"You have to go?"

"Seems like it," said Asuka as she looked at him. Shinji seemed worried however, and so she reassured him with a slight pat on the shoulder. Shinji was slightly taller than her now, so she had to stand up straighter than when she was a kid.

"I'll be fine," she said. "Misato wouldn't let something happen, and I doubt it's something dangerous to begin with considering what Nerv has become."

Shinji still didn't seem that assured, but Asuka next hit him lightly on the cheek and smiled, saying, "Don't worry, I'll be back later tonight.

"Right," whispered Shinji.

"And I'll expect dinner by the time I get back as well," said Asuka.

"Yeah," said Shinji.

Asuka went back into her room and grabbed herself a jacket and a temporary Nerv ID card that Misato had given her. Saying goodbye to Shinji once again, she walked out through the front door.

Shinji watched her leave, wondering as he did multiple times before now, if he would ever see her again.

* * *

Asuka took the bus to one of the many outposts that would take her into the underground fortress where Nerv was. Nerv had always been a public company, although the public didn't know what actually went on there until the angels attack and Third Impact was initiated. Afterwards, they started to open up more, until they now were in charge of the remodeling process of Tokyo-3.

Misato met Asuka outside one of these outposts, and they walked through it, taking the elevator down into the Geofront.

"Sorry I had to call you today Asuka," said Misato.

"Its fine, I wasn't doing anything anyways," said Asuka as she thought of her and Shinji's earlier embarrassment.

"Haven't figured out what you want to get him either?"

"Is it obvious?" asked Asuka, still aware that she had dark circles under her eyes.

"Very," said Misato. "You didn't sleep much last night?"

"Hardly, though Shinji seemed not to have gotten much either."

"Does he still have nightmares?" asked Misato.

"I'm not sure," said Asuka, though in truth, that was likely the cause of his sleeplessness.

As they reached the bottom of the Geofront, a car picked them up, and they drove the rest of the way to Nerv. The Geofront hadn't change much since the time of Third Impact, only that the landscape was remodeled slightly to accommodate for the damage the Evangelions did to it. Asuka remembered that she had done some of this herself.

Reaching the giant pyramid that was Nerv, Asuka and Misato got out, and Asuka was surprised to see that Ritsuko and somebody else were there to great them.

"Good, you've arrived Asuka," said Ritsuko. "Has Misato told you what we're doing here today?"

Asuka shook her head, but she was looking at the person next to Ritsuko. She had heard a lot about Rei from Shinji, and so she still had troubles getting along with her.

"Hey Rei," said Asuka in what she hoped was a friendly voice.

"Asuka," nodded Rei. Rei herself still had trouble talking with other people, but at least she did call Asuka by her first name now.

"Misato...did you not tell Asuka about what we're doing?" asked Ritsuko as she directed her gaze towards Misato.

"Umm..." started Misato, but Asuka interrupted her.

"Why...what is it?" asked Asuka skeptically.

"Asuka, you remember that Gehirn had some of its founding in genetics?"

"Yeah," said Asuka slowly.

"Well...today we're conducting some tests involved with that. Simply put, we're researching a humans DNA structure. The government asked to do this since Ritsuko has some knowledge on the subject, and most of the equipment is already available so-"

"You still haven't said what I'm doing," said Asuka as she looked at Misato, her eyes starting to narrow.

"The AT-fields," said Ritsuko tonelessly.

Asuka turned towards her.

"What?"

"The government wants to learn where the AT-fields come from, whether its in our DNA...or something else."

"Don't we already know the answer for that?" asked Asuka. "An AT-field is the embodiment of a persons soul, the thing which separates us from other humans."

"We tried to explain that to the government but..."

"If we want to continue receiving funding from the government, then we have to do this, no matter what we already know." answered Ritsuko. "The government still holds Nerv responsible for the attacks by the angels, and because of that, without there funding, the rebuilding process won't continue."

Asuka was silent as she looked from Misato to Ritsuko

"Are you okay with this?" she asked Rei.

Rei nodded silently.

'Still the same,' thought Asuka.

Sighing deeply, she thought briefly what Shinji would say if he could hear her reply.

"Fine...I'll do this," said Asuka.

* * *

It wasn't anything like an entry plug, but it still felt weird.

Asuka and Rei were hooked up to all sorts of equipment with wires crisscrossing over there bodies. Both were naked except for the loose fitting hospital gown that covered there bodies. Asuka was glad that Shinji wasn't here to see this, for multiple reasons.

"This might hurt for a second," said Ritsuko as she reached for Asuka's wrist. She had a syringe in her hand. Asuka could only guess what was in it, but she nodded all the same.

Ritsuko injected the fluid, and Asuka felt her consciousness starting to slip away. She had been subjected to several tests before becoming an Evangelion pilot, but this still felt strange. She hoped that Shinji wouldn't find out about this however, because she knew he wouldn't approve.

She was still awake, but she was unable to move. All pain seemed to have been removed from her mind; even her thought process was gone.

"Asuka, can you still hear me?" asked Ritsuko. Beside her, Misato had a worried look on her face.

Asuka heard herself reply, but she couldn't make out the words.

"Okay," said Ritsuko.

Asuka wasn't sure what Ritsuko was looking at, but there appeared to be some sort of monitor beside the bed that she was watching.

"How does Rei look?" asked Ritsuko to the other doctor.

"Same."

"Figures," said Misato. In her mind, this test was entirely pointless, but she also saw the need for it. Even so, she felt worried. This technology was entirely new, and she couldn't deny that there was in fact a risk involved. Looking at the monitor beside Asuka's bed, she watched as strands of DNA were projected on the screen and enlarged.

"No change in the patients," said Ritsuko. "Continuing with the test."

* * *

Shinji sat on his bed, looking up at the ceiling. It was getting close to night now, and still no word from Asuka. Even if she was busy, he had at the very least expected a call from Misato, letting him know that everything was alright. He couldn't shake his fear that something had happened.

Sitting up, he left his room and walked into the kitchen, glancing at the clock on the wall.

'I suppose I should at least start dinner,' thought Shinji.

It wasn't extravagant, simple fish and rice. He wasn't in the mood to cook anything right now to begin with, but he wanted something made at least whenever Asuka came home.

Just as he was beginning to think that the silence had gone on long enough, he heard the front door open.

Turning around, he saw that Asuka was taking off her shoes in the front doorway.

"Asuka...your back," said Shinji

"Yeah...sorry for taking so long," said Asuka as she started walking towards Shinji. She seemed tired however, and was walking slowly.

"Did you make dinner?" she asked.

"Yeah...its ready," said Shinji as he glanced at her as she walked passed.

"Great...I'm-"

Asuka stumbled as she walked, but managed to catch herself on the kitchen table.

"Asuka!" shouted Shinji, darting forward to assist her.

"I'm okay," said Asuka as she shook off Shinji, "just a little tired is all."

Next second though, her face turned blank and she fell backwards. Shinji thankfully caught her just as she almost hit the floor. Her eyes were slightly glazed over, and for a second, Shinji couldn't find his voice.

"Asuka..."

Light seemed to come to her eyes as he spoke to her.

"...I'm a little light headed I think..." mumbled Asuka.

"What did they do?" asked Shinji, his voice steadily rising.

"Could you not speak so loud..." said Asuka. "I'll be fine it a bit so..."

She seemed to lose herself again, and next second, she pushed Shinji away, just as she felt bile rip against her throat as she vomited on the kitchen table. She retched violently, bringing up both breakfast and black oil, which was likely the coffee.

Forgetting about himself, Shinji scooped Asuka up in his arms and ran to the bathroom. He barely made, just as she retched again, this time making it into the toilet.

"Fucking hell," Asuka swore in between puking.

Shinji was about to open his mouth, when Asuka snarled, "Not now!" though it game out in a gasp.

Shinji sat next to her for several minutes as Asuka emptied her stomach. He couldn't do much, except hold her hair behind her head to make sure she didn't puke on it. Asuka kept swearing, cursing everything that even entered her head. Shinji heard his own name uttered a few times, but he knew it wasn't in malice.

Spitting several times into the toilet, Asuka brought her head up and wiped the edge of her mouth with the sleeve of her shirt. She didn't look the greatest.

"Get me some water," she said weakly.

Shinji didn't want to leave her alone, but he obeyed nonetheless. Filling a glass from the kitchen he carried it back into the bathroom and gave it to Asuka. She rinsed the water around inside her mouth for several seconds until she spit it out.

"How are you feeling?" asked Shinji.

"Fucking incredible," said Asuka angrily, though as she saw the worried look on Shinji's face she replied, "Sorry...but I feel like shit right now."

Standing up was still difficult, so Asuka had to lean on Shinji as they walked out of the bathroom. Asuka looked towards the kitchen were the black bile was starting to collect and shuddered.

Walking into the living room, Asuka sat down slowly with Shinji assisting her.

"Can you get me a change of clothes...anything will be fine."

Shinji thought about questioning her on this logic, as he had very rarely been inside her room before, but now wasn't the best time he supposed.

He was in and out of her room as fast as he could go, grabbing the first thing that his eyes had set on which was a loose shirt and sweatpants. Handing these to Asuka, he turned and left the room as she changed.

"Its okay," said Asuka, letting him know that he could come back in.

Shinji walked back in and sat down next to her, looking at her face. She was pale white, but her complexion was slowing starting to come back.

"How do I look? And don't say I look fine, because I don't."

"Terrible," said Shinji.

"Thats putting it mildly," said Asuka. "This reminds me of the first time I had beer."

It had been about a year ago, and Shinji could remember it as both of them hadn't felt very good the next day.

"Asuka, what did you they do to you?"

"Shinji...I expected this, or at least some of this. Ritsuko said there would be side affects, but-"

"Side affects of what?" Shinji all but shouted.

"Forget it Shinji. I knew what I was doing, so just forget it."

Standing up to fast, Asuka felt all the blood go to her head and almost felt like she was going to pass out again. Shinji caught her, but his face was still angry.

"Don't shut me out like that Asuka, not now."

Asuka opened her eyes and looked at him, aware of how close they were.

'And my breath probably smells like shit,' she thought.

"Fine, they ran some tests and gave us a sedative."

"Us?" asked Shinji.

"Both me and Rei," said Asuka.

"They did this to both of you?"

"Calm down Shinji. What are you going to do? Complain to Misato about it? She didn't like it either, but I still made the decision to go ahead with it."

"No more," said Shinji. "You aren't going back there."

"Who are you to decide how I lead my life?" asked Asuka, getting angry in turn now. "I can make my own decisions."

"Asuka I just...I don't like seeing you hurt."

Asuka looked at him, but felt the anger starting to leave herself. She couldn't stay angry at him, not after how worried he had been. If there positions had been switched she would have reacted the same.

"Idiot," she sighed as she leaned against him.

Shinji looked at her and brushed a strand of her hair away from her eyes. If though she had been puking not even a few minutes ago, she still looked beautiful.

"C'mon," said Shinji, "I think some rice would do you go."

"What else is there?"

"Fish, but I don't think you should try to eat that now."

Asuka nodded, even though she still didn't like it. She had always had white rice.

* * *

Asuka went to bed shortly after finishing dinner, and Shinji had sat with her for a while. He had been surprised that she had allowed him to enter her room not once but twice in the same day. She had gone to sleep quickly though, and Shinji hadn't stayed long afterwards.

As he closed the door to her bedroom, he saw the doorknob to the front door turning. Misato had come back.

Misato stepped through the doorway, and was greeted by Shinji, who didn't look happy.

"Why didn't you stay with her? She was half dead when she got home?" he asked.

"She said she was fine...and to not worry."

"You know how she is. She's too stubborn to ask for help from other people."

"Shinji-"

"For being a guardian, you certainly don't act like one very much."

Without waiting for Misato's reply, Shinji walked into his own room and slammed the door. He stared at the closed door for several seconds before hitting his fist against the wood, splintering his knuckles. Blood trickled down from the open wound, but he didn't seem to notice. He was too used to pain to care about something so insignificant.

'And Asuka had been in much worse pain earlier,' thought Shinji.

Walking over to his bed, he sat down on it and thought-

'It may be time to decide on a different apartment,' thought Shinji.


	4. Expectation

Even though Shinji had thought that Misato would stick around to make sure Asuka was alright, she was still gone in the morning when he woke up.

He first checked on Asuka, and was surprised to see that she was awake. She still seemed very weak, and she had developed a fever during the night. She was in a cold sweat when he found her lying awake in her bed, shivering uncontrollably. Shinji cursed himself for not keeping an eye on her during the night, buts whats done was done.

He drenched a hand towel in cold water and laid it over her head, hoping that this would cool her down.

"Thanks Shinji," sighed Asuka as he stood up.

Shinji nodded and said, "You should probably try to sleep since you didn't much last night."

"Yeah..."

"I'll let you be then," said Shinji as he turned to leave. As he did though, he felt his hand being pulled back. Turning back around, he saw that Asuka was leaning over and holding onto his hand.

"Stay for a while," said Asuka quietly.

Shinji looked at her, feeling slightly confused, but he nodded all the same and said, "Okay."

Shinji sat next to Asuka's bed reading a book for a long time. She continued holding onto his hand, not seeming to want to let go. She was still restless, and they talked quietly, but for the most part, Asuka just lay there with her eyes closed. Even though she had a fever, she still enjoyed the warmth from Shinji's hand. The only time that Shinji let go of her hand was to replace the cloth on her head with one more cold.

"Hey Shinji," Asuka said after many minutes of them not talking.

"Hmmm?" he asked.

"What should we do about the whole apartment thing?"

Shinji was glad that she had brought this up, because he hadn't wanted to. After yesterday, he had wanted to as far away from this place as possible, but as things were, that was hardly plausible. He was nervous about telling Asuka his reasoning as well, thinking that she might complain that he was worrying to much. After what had happened though, you couldn't really blame him.

"I don't know. We need to find one certainly, but you need rest first before that."

"Couldn't you fill out everything yourself."

"I could, but that would require me to leave you here, and I'm not doing that."

Asuka laughed lightly at that.

"You're too caring Shinji...you know that? Though I appreciate it."

"You sure its not a fault of mine?"

"Well...sometimes I guess, though right now, that isn't the case."

Asuka rolled over to look at the back of his head. She wasn't sure what these feelings were that were coursing through her, but she couldn't say she hated these emotions.

After this, Asuka was finally able to sleep for a while, and Shinji decided that he would take his leave for now. Shutting Asuka's door quietly, he walked out into the living room and sat down on the couch. He wasn't in any mood to read now, so he set that down next to himself. Laying down, he rested his head against the arm of the couch and thought about his next course of actions.

Staying in Misato's apartment wouldn't last forever, he knew that for a fact, but leaving it also as such felt odd.

Shinji decided that he had to progress with things, even if he hurt others in the process. Asuka was...somebody special to him, and he didn't want to see her like that again. There time as pilots was enough, and the time they spent with Misato and Ritsuko was about to end. He felt bad about not saying anything to Rei...and then there was his father.

'No...that won't change ever again. That is as it should be.'

Shinji decided that it was time to make a phone call.

He talked on the phone for only a couple minutes, getting his point across as much as possible. He hoped he had done a proper job of this, but he couldn't be sure till he talked to face to face as well.

Walking into his own room, he grabbed himself a jacket and was just about to leave the apartment when he heard a noise behind him.

"Are you going out Shinji?" asked Asuka from where she stood in the doorway to her room

Shinji had hoped he wouldn't have to explain things to Asuka, not until he had at least sorted everything out. He hoped that she would trust him though.

"Yeah...I'm going to talk about somethings with Misato."

"Shinji," said Asuka as she started walking towards him, "if its about what happened at Nerv yesterday, I told you, its fine."

"Its not just that though. I want to talk to her about other things as well...things that should be taken care of."

"Then I should go as well."

"No...you're still not well enough, and I don't want to risk it."

"You're being stubborn," complained Asuka.

"Maybe," agreed Shinji, "maybe it won't even matter, but I want to talk with her anyway."

"Shinji-"

Shinji wasn't listening to her though. Walking across the hallway to Asuka's door, he stopped in front of her and brought her into a one armed hug. Asuka was surprised by this, and at first starting stammering slightly, though as Shinji strengthened his grip around her, she relented, and brought her own arms up to wrap around his back.

They stood like that for several seconds, until Shinji broke apart from her. If he had wished it, he probably could have just stayed put and enjoyed his time here with Asuka, just the two of them. As much as he wished that, he needed to talk to Misato.

"I won't be gone long," said Shinji as he started walking towards the door.

Asuka remembered that she had said something similar, hardly even a day ago, and look how that had turned out.

"I'll wait Shinji," said Asuka.

'I'll always be waiting,' she thought somewhere inside her heart.

Shinji left leaving Asuka standing in the hallway. Walking back into her bedroom, she sat on her bed and hung her head. How long had it been since she cried? Several years?

Even so, the tears still came.

* * *

Shinji word the bus into town where he was planning on meeting Misato and yet, he still hadn't figured out what he was going to say. The apartment were on the forefront of his mind, but there was other stuff as well, many of which involved Asuka.

They met at a small cafe on a side street which both of them knew. Shinji only had to wait around for a few minutes until Misato showed up, still driving her old car.

"Aren't you ever going to replace that?" asked Shinji.

"One day maybe," said Misato as she stepped out of her beat up car. "Though it still has another year or two left in her."

Walking over to the table Shinji was sitting at, the sat down across from each other. It was a nice day out, so Shinji had decided they may as well sit outside. An umbrella covered them from the sun, and together, they started talking underneath it.

"How is Asuka feeling?" started Misato.

"Tired, but getting better. She should be sleeping right now."

Shinji paused here, looking across the table at Misato.

"Shinji...I told you I was sorry yesterday but-"

"But you didn't have time this morning to check up on her," said Shinji tonelessly.

Misato closed her mouth, feeling hurt by Shinji's words.

"Forget it though, thats not why I wanted to talk to you. Tomorrow, I want to you to help us move. We're leaving the apartment tomorrow."

Misato blinked, surprised by this sudden statement. She should have expected this, even known that they would be leaving to live on there own soon. This was almost too soon though, with hardly an notification.

"Have you talked to Asuka about this?" Misato asked.

"Not in depth no, but she knows as well that we can't live here forever, and after what happened yesterday, she knows as I do that it would be best to leave sooner. So, can you help us move tomorrow or not."

"Shinji...this hardly gives me any time to-"

"Can you help or not?" asked Shinji bluntly. He had to be like this. If he wasn't, if he wasn't sure about what he was doing, then he would second guess his decision.

"...I'll make time," said Misato. This almost felt like an interrogation.

"Thank you," replied Shinji.

The stared across the table at each other, not wanting to give an inch to each other. The roles were no longer as they were. Shinji had changed, Misato could see this, or he was in the midst of changing himself. He seemed sure of himself, but Misato was still worried about how things would progress, not just between herself and Shinji, but between Asuka and Shinji. She had looked out for them to the best of her ability, sometimes not being able to help them, but always thinking about them. She didn't want them to make a mistake down the road, as she had made when she was there age.

"Shinji, may I ask you a question now?"

"Go for it," he replied.

Misato didn't miss the sarcasm, but ignored it.

"Why are you doing this now, and not later? It isn't just because of what happened at Nerv. Both you and Asuka have known that you'd have to leave sooner or later. So is it because of Asuka? Is it because you want to live together from now on. Shinji do you love Asuka?"

Shinji was caught of guard by this last question, and was momentarily left speechless. Did he love Asuka? He couldn't answer that right now, though its possible he didn't want to know the answer as well.

"I don't know whether I do or not," said Shinji as he evaded the question. "Nor do I know whether we'll live together. I suppose we will in a sense, because we'll still be around each so much. More than anything though, I want to try living on my own I guess. Asuka tried it before, and that didn't work out of course. We're both older now though, and able to make decisions that we weren't able to before. For myself, I want to rely on myself from now on. I appreciate the fact that you took both me and Asuka in Misato, but thats the way its been my whole life, and I'm sick of it. I want to try living my own life for once. Not in the shadow of somebody, or because somebody told me what to do. I don't want that anymore."

Shinji finished, and silence engulfed the two of them.

'I had forgotten how much Shinji resented being an Evangelion pilot,' thought Misato, 'but it looks he may be ready to continue on his own after all.'

Shinji and Asuka had been the kids that Misato had never, and sometimes, she had forgotten that they weren't hers to control. She realized this now.

'I can't stop them if this is what they want, but I can hope that things will be alright between the two of them.'

"If thats what you think, then I can't stop you Shinji. You're right, both you and Asuka are old enough to decide on your futures."

"Then you're okay with this?" asked Shinji.

"I am," said Misato.

Shinji grinned then, the first he had showed since they had started talking. His worries had been groundless afterall, and now he wished he hadn't been so hard on Misato.

"Misato...I'm sorry for saying things as I did."

"Thats alright Shinji," said Misato as she stood up.

Together, they walked back to Misato's car, though as Shinji was about to say his goodbyes, Misato stopped him.

"Hold on Shinji, I've got something for you here."

Reaching into the back of her car, she grabbed a package and tossed it to Shinji. It was wrapped in paper and a ribbon tied the whole thing together.

"What is this?"

"Earlier birthday present from both me and Rei, though she did most of the deciding. Since I know both of you won't be able to see each other anytime soon, I decided I would take her out so she could get something for you."

"Misato...I-"

"I'll tell Rei you appreciated the gift."

Stepping into her car, she started it and had one last thing she wanted to tell Shinji before they parted ways.

"And I expect both you and Asuka to keep in contact with me after you move out, as well as an invitation when you two get married."

Shinji took this as a joke, and replied as such.

"I'll be sure to have your assistance when Asuka chooses as a gown."

Misato laughed at this, and drove away afterwards, leaving dust behind her car as she did.

Shinji couldn't help but smile as she left, glad that they were still on good terms with each other.

* * *

Shinji arrived back at the apartment later then he had intended, and when he opened the door, he was greeted by Asuka.

"You're up?"

"I'm feeling better," said Asuka, "and you took longer than I thought you would. Was everything okay?"

"Yeah...better than I thought it would be," said Shinji as he stepped through the door. "We'll be moving tomorrow."

This hit Asuka rather hard.

"Tomorrow? Isn't that a bit sudden?"

"Misato thought so too...though she understood why as well. She agreed to help us move tomorrow as well."

Looking at Asuka though, Shinji saw that she was frowning.

"Are you okay with this?"

"Yeah, but I wish you would have let me know before you left is all."

"Sorry...I didn't want to worry you incase Misato was...unwilling I guess."

"I hope you weren't harsh with her."

"I tried not to be but..."

'It was thinking of you that made me harsh with her I think,' thought Shinji, but he wasn't about to say this.

"Hungry?" asked Shinji.

"Yeah, a bit," nodded Asuka.

Shinji made a small meal for the two of them, and they ate more or less in silence, the only thing heard being the clink of forks.

Shinji washed the dishes while Asuka sat at the kitchen table with her legs crossed in front of her. She did seem to be feeling better thought Shinji as he looked at her. She had her chin resting in the palm of her hand and was looking up at the ceiling.

"Hey Shinji?"

"Hmmm?"

"How would you feel about just getting a one bedroom apartment?"

Shinji almost dropped the plate he was washing in surprise.

"What did you say?" he asked.

"Do I need to repeat it?" asked Asuka. Her cheeks were slightly pink.

"No...you don't," said Shinji. "Just that...you were against it before so-"

"Why not? We've slept in the same room before."

"When we were younger...yeah," nodded Shinji. "Now though-"

"Are you against it now?"

"Its not that," said Shinji.

"Then what is it?" asked Asuka.

Shinji didn't want to say it, didn't want to let Asuka know that he sometimes thought about her in such ways.

"I'll think on it," said Shinji

"Hmph," sighed Asuka.

Shinji was surprised that she was so unhappy about this, but didn't say anything about it. He wanted that, he truly did, but he was nervous as well.

"What is this by the way?" asked Asuka as she picked up the present that Rei had gotten for Shinji.

"Early birthday present from Rei," said Shinji.

"Are you going to open it?"

"I figured I'd wait till my birthday before I opened it."

"Oh," said Asuka.

She hadn't forgotten about Shinji's birthday, but she had hoped that knowing what Rei had gotten him might have helped in her own decision.

Later, though she had protested, Shinji made Asuka go to bed, even though she said she wasn't tired. Shinji therefore had sat with her for a while until she had grown tired, and then he had carried her to her bedroom. It was amazing to him that he had spent so much time her bedroom in the past two days when he had hardly stepped foot into it before. Asuka still didn't seem to care though.

After she had fallen asleep, Shinji sat at the kitchen table for sometime, looking at Rei's present. It was very thoughtful of her that she had gotten that for him. He wanted to open it now, but as he had told Asuka, he was going to wait. He wondered how Rei was doing, knowing that she had been subjected to the same sedative as Asuka had and wished that he had asked Misato how she was doing.

The subject of the one bedroom apartment still hovered over Shinji's mind, but he thought that he would sleep on it. He did think he already had the answer inside him from the moment that Asuka had brought it up.

So many things were happening so fast that Shinji was starting to lose track of them. Was it because he was turning eighteen soon that he was thinking about his future, or had that happened long before now? He wasn't sure, but he was ready to start college, ready to live his own life, and if Asuka was apart of that life...

"...No, best not to think about that," Shinji told himself.

Things would happen if they would, and Shinji could only wait for that moment.


End file.
